How To Know If He's A Player

September 9, 2020

How to Know If He's a Player

Players are everywhere, but sometimes we don’t know how to spot them. If you are looking for more than just someone to mess around with, then read on. 

I am going to reveal to you what those players don't want you to know. I am going to break down the ways you can avoid dating a player.

I have three tools that you can use to your advantage to build rapport and a connection that is intuitive and natural to you.

You want to know if they are being deceptive or not. This is something that will stand out to you after reading this. 

Want to know more? Here are the signs to watch out for - trust me, it does happen to the best of us! 

Is He Actually Investing in You?

Some guys might act like they are investing in you and want a relationship, but do they really? 

Being able to know how to recognize this is going to make things easier. Whether you are looking for a relationship or not, these signs are good to know.

The dating scene these days is crazy.

You need to know how to spot the great guys apart from those that might just want to use you and move on with their own life. 

Know how to locate these types of negative men. Also, know how to find someone who is ready to invest in you. They should want to invest in you and a relationship. 

You deserve real love and not someone who is going to play you.

College Campus Study

A study was performed on a college campus. A man and woman approached people of the opposite sex during it. The man approached women, and the woman approached men. They both asked the same question to numerous individuals.

Here's What Was Asked And The Replies

"I've seen you around campus. I find you quite attractive and I was wondering if you would like to go out with me?"

50% of both the men and women said yes. They agreed to go on a date with the person. 

They then changed the question.

"I've seen you around campus. I find you quite attractive and I was wondering if you would like to go sleep with me tonight?"

The percentage of women that said yes before went to 0. The percentage of men who said yes before actually increased up to 75%!

The other 25% of men who said no actually apologized for saying no and gave a reason to the woman as to why they couldn't, but they normally would. 

The Result?

The results showed that men are more likely and even more willing to engage in short-term relationships. Women would prefer men to want more.

Short Term or Long Term

Just because a man shows you interest does not mean that he is showing you long-term interest

He might want something short-term, not long-term. This is completely up to him and you won't be able to change his mind on this.

But, Why?

Many women wonder why, why would he do this? Why isn't he interested in more? How could I see that he was a player if he was being so nice and amazing?

The answer is so simple that women sometimes do not want to believe it is true. He simply just wants to sleep with you and have a short-term relationship. They don’t want something so involved. 

Men actually do three things to show their interest in a woman. Women, however, will sometimes confuse these things for real investment in them. These signs are actually not even signs of wanting something long-term at all. 

A Player Will Tell You What You Want To Hear

Men like to do this more often than not.

They will tell a woman anything she wants to hear.

He might even tell you he is interested in a long-term relationship. He might say you're special, unique, beautiful, and everything about you is something he loves.

He might tell you he wants to get married one day, sweep you off your feet, and anything else to grab your attention. 

These are just words though. You cannot trust anything a man says as an actual investment. He is not actually physically moving forward with anything but just saying these things. 

He is not investing in you. 

In fact, a man's words are the number one thing that he'll use to play you. So, if a man tells you something listen, but don't immediately trust until you see other variables. His actions should show you his true intent. 

Players Are Overly Confident

One of the things that makes a man more attractive is his confidence. Men who are players are almost always extremely confident.

He wants to show you he's a great guy. He wants to seem sure of himself. However, this is a strategy used by many men looking for a short term outcome. 

As humans, we are incredibly good at judging our mating value. We have a good idea of the type of person we can attract.

If we think they should be attracted to us, it's easier to be more comfortable and confident.

However, if he is great looking to you, model-quality looking, you will end up being on the other end of this scenario.

You will be the intimidated one. You will be the one that might be dazzled by him.

You will end up treating the person differently. The subconscious cues or communication that you have when you think of someone being higher or lower value will show.

Even if you try to think and look at everyone as equal, it’s impossible.

High-Value Partners

Men will pretend that they are of higher value than a woman.

They'll do this to portray that they are this high-value mate who has all of these different possibilities. Women are always attracted to this type of guy and he'll pull it off. He will do these little jokes that hit your insecurities and goof around with you. 

He will make you seem silly or awkward and do it lightheartedly. He will make you feel good. 

If he is doing this, it is because he is making himself seem cool, calm, and collected.

He doesn't want to show that he is worried or concerned with what you think about him.

This is one of the top strategies for pickup artists to use. 

However, this is not always done by low-quality players. Some men do have a good sense of humor, so don't use it as the only indicator that he is a player. 

What You See Can Be Deceiving

A great way to know if he's a player is if he likes to show off.

Don't get caught up or hooked on what he is driving, what he wears, what jewelry he has, where he vacations, or even that cute little coy smile he has. 

You don't know where the money for all of this is coming from. Just because they have all of these items does not mean he is living the high life.

Just because he is living like this now does not mean that he has the freedom to continue living like this.

Who says  all of this stuff is even his? He might be borrowing the items for show. It might also mean he is living his life on credit card debt

Do not depend on this wholeheartedly until you get to know him and his situation even more.

Until then, you don't actually know what is going on with him or where he got all of this stuff. 

Signs He is Investing in You Long-Term

Now that you have seen some signs so you can know if he's a player, here are three cues that actually show you that he is interested. These cues show he is ready for a longer-term, more committed relationship. 

Quality Time Spent Together

How is the quality of time spent with him? Is the time spent with him actually good quality? What do you both do together?

Do you know more about him and is he sharing his world with you? 

The more time you spend with someone the more you are going to learn. This includes truth.

You will learn more about them, their life, and the world around them. This is what makes quality time essential. 

Do you just talk over the phone or computer? Does he want to come over often, or not at all? If he's not taking the time to spend time with you, then don’t trust it. 

You're not building a relationship until you spend more quality time with each other. That's the number one way players manipulate women is by not spending in-person time with them.

Doing whatever over the phone or over a computer is where a man can do or say anything because there's no accountability.

He is just talking smooth talk to get you. 

Does He Introduce You to People He Knows?

Is he introducing you to his social network?

Do you know his friends? His family? His co-workers?

This is something that comes at a cost for him. Once he introduces you to these people, there is a risk to his reputation. He is introducing you as someone he is dating and is with. 

The risks can include you learning the truth about who he surrounds himself with. There are all sorts of risks that a man has to take if he wants to engage in a committed relationship.

The more that you meet his social circle and his network, take that as an indication that he's interested in a committed relationship.

Is it Public?

Being public is a big deal. If he changes his Facebook status or posts on social media about you, it is a big thing.

He is letting the world know that you guys are together. This is him making a public display, or announcement about it. 

This is much more than him just off-handedly telling someone that you both are dating. It has to be something big. He has to be showing everyone and not hiding it. 

Once he shows everyone he is in a relationship publicly, you know he is ready for a long-term relationship.

If he doesn't do this, then he might be leaving his options open for him to meet more women. 

At The End Of The Day...

You can use your overall judgment to know if he's a player or not. Make sure to dig deeper into things, and find out what he really wants from you. Of course, know what you really want too. 

Don’t trust his words unless he is showing you the things mentioned here. To recap:

-Spending quality time with you

-Let it be publicly known you're dating

-Introduce you to his network of people

If you can say all of these things were done, then you know it is a long-term thing. If not, it might be time to say goodbye and move on.

Do Men Send You Mixed Signals?

Are they interested one day and then gone the next?

If you’d like to learn more about how to read a man’s emotions, check out my free presentation called “Inside the Male Mind”. You’ll learn a lot about what it takes to get inside a man’s head. Click here to learn more.

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