There are many things that make men’s skin crawl and make them never want to date a woman again…
And you’ve probably heard a few before.
But I’m not going to tell you about superficial things like her hair swirled on the walls of the shower or wearing a face caked full of makeup.
I’m going to tell you the things that almost all high-quality men hate – but would never tell you to your face. In fact, he might even be out the door before you ever realize these things are a problem.
So, what are they? Here are 5 common habits men find disgusting:
Nowadays, this is a pretty common habit among women and men.
Being addicted to your phone isn’t great for you for a variety of reasons. But in a relationship or dating scenario, it can be detrimental.
Imagine going on a date and the person you’re with greets you and sets their phone down on the table. As you’re talking, he casually touches the screen to check for updates. Immediately, you start to wonder, “Does he think I’m boring?
Then the food comes. You dive your fork into your creamy pasta and slurp it up, and he says, “No! I was going to take a picture! You messed it up. Try to put your pasta back to how it was.”
Now, you’re annoyed. “Can’t I just enjoy my noodles in peace?” you think.
Maybe you’ve been on a date like this before. Or maybe you have been the amateur pasta photographer.
When it comes to dating, men and women are looking for someone who wants to enjoy special moments with them. This is how you build an emotional connection that goes beyond intimacy, which is super important if you want to be in a committed relationship.
The truth is, our phones are a distraction. They allow us to escape the inevitable tension that results from the masculine/feminine dynamic. That tension is powerful and important to the relationship.
It’s impossible to build intimacy and connection with anyone if they are constantly texting or scrolling through the news or social media or their phone. I don’t care if you’re an influencer or you just love sharing pictures with your family and friends, it is one of the fastest ways to avoid real human connection.
On top of that, it’s a drug. Social media companies are known to use behavioral psychology to try to trigger dopamine in your brain and need more of it. And high-quality men are typically the guys who are able to avoid immediate rewards and instead, invest in a long-term payoff. I encourage you to take the same approach. Try to stay in the moment. Stay present, even if you have that physical desire to escape into the social media world. The more you practice this, the stronger your “presence” will be felt around men.
No one likes it when someone picks a fight with them for no reason. This has a lot to do with insecurity in the relationship like we touched on earlier.
Sometimes women, and men, pick fights with their partner as a way to create a connection. They start fights because they want to keep the relationship “fiery” and “passionate.” They are afraid their love is going to fade away if things are too stable. They may mistake the peaceful connection for being boring or stale. But frankly, starting fights as a way to spark passion in a relationship is unhealthy.
Even healthy relationships go through ups and downs. But you don’t want to be the source of pain in your relationship. The man you’re dating will eventually recognize this toxic behavior and want to separate himself from it, which will mean leaving you completely.
I promise creating a fight to ensure the person your dating cares isn’t the answer to your relationship woes. If you feel like you want to spice things up, focus on creating meaningful moments with him. This could mean going on a date at a place with a beautiful setting. Being in aesthetically beautiful places can change our attitude and emotions.
Another way to create a meaningful connection is by doing something physically challenging together like rock climbing or hiking, or taking him on a magical, surprising date he would never expect. When you are faced with a physical challenge, your primal instincts kick in. And if you can experience those primal emotions with others, there’s a shared bonding experience. It’s another way to build a connection.
And finally, you can try taking an emotional risk with him. This is when you reveal a part of you he hasn’t seen before, such as character flaws, guilty pleasures, or introducing him to your friends or family. Seeing this vulnerable side of you will make him feel bonded to you emotionally. I don’t mean you should start sharing baggage as a way to make him feel sorry for you. I mean revealing cute and quirky things about your personality that you may immediately leave off your dating profile but can be endearing to someone who cares about you.
Maybe you can reveal a silly phobia you have. Personally, I can’t stand the sound of popsicle sticks when they rub against a paper napkin or nail files. Can’t STAND it when Kathy files her nails. I need to be in another room. And my wife HATES the feeling of rubbing cotton swabs together.
Those things are weird I know...but kind of funny. Sharing things like that make us feel human and feel like we know something unique and personal about someone.
Insecurity in the relationship means the woman he is dating is always looking to him for reassurance that he still likes her and wants to be with her.
If he’s showing you through his words and actions he wants to be with you, there is no need to ask him and nag him constantly for his attention and affection. When we approach relationships out of fear, we can’t be the confident, loving giving partner we need to be.
The highest value relationships are the ones where people don’t NEED to be with the other person to survive. Instead, they are choosing to be with each other to thrive.
So, if he wants to spend some time with his friends or do his own thing, don’t immediately resort to the worst-case scenario in your mind. It’s so important to be confident in yourself so that you’re not constantly relying on your boyfriend to make you feel good about yourself. When you know you’re an amazing, smart, beautiful woman, you won’t question his feelings about you. You’ll think, “This man is lucky to be with me. He would be a fool to let me go. And if he does, I wouldn’t want him anyway. I only want someone who loves me fiercely and appreciates all the great things I bring to the table.”
Now, maybe you’re saying, “The reason I feel insecure in my relationship is because my boyfriend makes me feel that way. He is so hot and cold. Sometimes he’s so into me then he ignores me, talks down to me, and disregards my feelings.” If this is the case, you should not be with a man who makes you feel this way.
You want to be with someone who cherishes you and shows you they love you through their words and actions. Being with your partner should make you feel a sense of peace. You know he is there for you and loves you. Don’t stay in a relationship with a person who makes you feel insecure. And don’t be insecure in a relationship if he never gives you a reason to be.
The most loyal, considerate men won’t appreciate the excitement and entertainment of gossiping about others. There are a few reasons why these guys won’t tolerate this behavior.
First of all, high-quality men are too interesting and passionate to waste their precious time talking about other people’s failures or challenges. They have their own stories they’re more interested in discussing or living.
Second, when your cup is filled and you’re happy and fulfilled...you don’t want anyone to suffer. You don’t want them to suffer in life and you certainly don’t want to be spreading negative or embarrassing information about someone else.
The best question to ask yourself is….Am I being helpful to this person and others by sharing this information? Am I OK if this person finds out what I’m saying about them? I find it’s best not to mention others when they’re not around.
And finally, smart men know the truth about gossipers. If someone will gossip to you about someone, they’ll gossip to someone about you.
Your boyfriend doesn’t want your mom, sister or best friend knowing if he is having a problem in the bedroom or embarrassing stories that make him look bad.
He is trusting you with his secrets and hoping you’ll respect his privacy by keeping your fights, problems, or whatever he’s shared with you between you and him.
Men want a woman who has our back and is going to support us, not character assassinate us. Ideally, you can look him in the eye and deal with the issue rather than talking to other people about it.
I can’t stress how important this is. If the man you’re dating overhears you talking badly about him to others, you will have broken his trust. He might not ever view you in the same way again. And it may even make him question if he wants to continue being in a relationship with you.
Men want their partner to be a source of light, positivity, and fun in their lives. If the woman they are dating complains about every little thing, it’s a big turn off.
You see, men usually try really hard to impress women. They want to be seen as a protector, a hunter, and a provider. So if a man goes out of his way to impress his girlfriend by taking her to a nice dinner and then she says, “Wow, the service is so slow.” “I hate this wine” “My chicken is bland.” He’ll think to himself, “Why did I bother dropping all this money on dinner just to hear her complain? She’s so unappreciative.”
And you can probably relate: would you want to be with a guy who is never pleased?
Of course, there are going to be moments you are down and want to take a load off by venting to the man you’re seeing. But if this is a daily occurrence, you’re eventually going to start bringing him down too.
As they say, misery loves company. And you know what every guy doesn’t want in their lives? Misery.
As humans, our emotions can be affected by the people we surround ourselves with. And if you’re in a good mood, being around a complainer can immediately turn a blessed moment into an opportunity for criticism.
If you have something you’re really unhappy with, like your job, and you’re complaining about it day in and day out, he is going to start evaluating what your overall lifestyle is like. And the emotional state we’re in most of the time is a great indicator of our overall lifestyle.
A high-quality guy desires an ambitious, successful woman who is ecstatic about her life and learns how to proactively act on challenges rather than complain about them. If you adopt this positive attitude, it will build his attraction for you and make him more likely to commit to you long-term because being around you is so refreshing and makes him feel energized.
Now that you know the common habits men find disgusting, you can work on avoiding these behaviors to attract a high-quality guy into your life.
Of course, this article just scratches the surface of guys’ biggest turn-offs…
And maybe you’re thinking, “How am I supposed to figure out what men like and don’t like when I’m not a man!”
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